Needless :: August 9th, 2002 ::
While making dinner last week, I had the gruesome experience of cutting my foot in two separate places on a nail that had worked its way out of one of the floorboards. As I doused the wounds in rubbing alcohol and Neosporin, I tried to stave off the forboding images of tetanus and lockjaw, which I’ve heard start with innocent wounds such as these. While treating the wound I was asked, “Do you remember when your last Tetanus shot was?” But of course, I had no real meaningful answer, which resulted in a small yet perceptable tremor of panic.
It was important to stay calm. We had guests, and I found it necessary to impress them or, failing that, at least not be reduced a simpering, fearful child in their presence. So I tried to focus on the tasks at hand: stop the bleeding, disinfect the cut, try not to get too much blood on the toilet, clean up any mess I made in the bathroom.
Since then, I’ve entertained intermittent visions of waking up paralyzed, of being driven to the hospital, of finding my condition is much, much worse than if I’d just gone in to get a tetanus shot as soon as the cut happened. While bringing my condition up in a polite conversation, I was told that when one gets lockjaw, one’s muscles tighten so much that their bones actually break.
I’ve used up pretty much every Band Aid in the house, and I’ve decimated our supply of anitbiotic ointments as well, much to her chagrin. But I’ve watched both the cuts recede, and I have not seen any of the mythic symptoms that accompany a nasty infection. So I think I’m in the clear. And that should make all of us happy, I think.
